Saturday, April 16, 2011

Told Noc this, might as well tell you all

I'll just copy paste my comment, yeah?

Sharing is caring, huh? Well, this is for Ava so we can try and get Reach back faster. Don't know if this is what you're looking for, and unfortunately I can't give you much due to not remembering anything before marrying Cathy...but, I do remember those years running. And now would be as good a time as any to unload some shit.

I don't like you people, or, at least, most of you. But nevertheless...

I ran from that thing for maybe...four years, give or take. The other six? Seven? I lost track of the time to be honest, was spent working for that thing. What I did- hehe, I tortured people. It wasn't like it is now. You didn't give the victim a chance, leave them secret messages and watch them from afar. The best part was savoring having them in your grasp and seeing the fear in their eyes as they silently plead for you to just let them go.
"You're human too, why won't you help me?"
"Why, why are you doing this to me?"
And sometimes it wouldn't be quick. It would be slow, starting with the fingers and moving on to the intestines. They would be alive through it, writhing in pain and silently wishing for it all to be over.
And when they finally broke, blood pooling into my hands, I would hand them over to it. This thing would take them and break them mentally, play over worst fears and give them rays of hope only to crush them. Over and over they would be twisted and broken. It was fun to me back then, I laughed as I pulled nails out and broke ribs one by one.
And I still don't think it was wrong. I still am confused as to why it's wrong to have hurt them.

Hehe, you wanna know my secret? The monster /changed/ me. I lack the necessary emotions to function as a normal person. I am a sociopath. I am crazy. Something happened to my brain ...that thing did something to my head. And now I'm no better than all the other minions. Maybe even worse as most of them don't have any class, they just act on basic emotion and let it control everything they do. They weren't around for the good old days...good- did I say good? I mean the bad days. Actually no, I don't know if it was good or bad, it was just years in my life.

So there it is. Wouldn't say it before because I learned to lie and make the victims trust me. I don't work for it anymore but...people might find it a tiny bit more difficult to trust me now, hehe.

So there you have it. One of the things I do remember about myself that my parents didn't tell me.


  1. Stupid children, too weak to comprehend the power which the Master holds, it breaks your mind. And all of you shall break... it is only a matter of Time. Bleed fools, bleed.

    Ah, Tony you... Hahahahahahaha!!!


  2. ...and that right there is Its strategy, i think. no matter what side you pick, we all break and fall in the end.

    so why not make things difficult for the bastard?

  3. Iscariot- Alright buddy, unfortunately you have no idea what you're talking about. So I'll let this comment go. Have a nice day.

    Ryuu- Hehe, what do you think I've been doing? Hell, I can't even remember how I broke free of that things control. Everything is /very/ confusing right now.

  4. How interesting.

    It appears that you and Arkady would get along quite well.

    I would watch your back if I were you.

  5. one secret out of many, right daddy? if only they could see what you did. hehehehehehehehehe i tell some of my family and /they/ get impressed.

    and you know even though it'll be your time to die in a while, i'm gonna be kinda sad to see you go. after all, you did things that i wish i could do. Mommy doesn't understand- is that why you hate me? because i'm becoming what you are? hehehehe have fun these next couple of months, daddy. i know i will.

  6. ...My best friend is an emotionally stunted sociopath.

    I kind of already guessed that, hun.

    As for the...servitude, nnhm. Ten years. This has been your life for ten years, I'm fairly sure that after five years anyone would try and see how much easier it was on the other side.


  7. No idea have I? It has been many years that I have served the Master, His loyal Disciple. I knew well what it was like to torture, to break the minds of those who resisted the Master. And it was wonderful, wonderful to taste the suffering, the pain of the rebels. And yet you have returned to their side, to defy the Master's will?

    Filthy heretic, you make me sick. Would that the Master would only allow me, I would enjoy tearing you apart.


  8. Ava dear, how could I have missed you?

    I do so love how how you make excuses. Myself or Redlight or any of the nameless "proxies" you people have killed, you despise us for the things we do. Yet come to find out that your friend has done just the same and what do you do? You try to excuse it, say it was what "anyone" would have done. Your hypocrisy amuses me to no end.


  9. I killed two men. I refuse to kill more. I only incapacitate.

    I don't despise Proxies for the things they do, I've said this many times in my blog. Look here, you dull-witted nutsack. If you're going to attempt to get all high-and-mighty with me, do your bloody research first. I don't advocate the killing of Proxies. At all. I am more predisposed to help them.

    And I've been close to snapping and killing Runners before. I hate everyone save those I can afford to care about.


  10. Well, perhaps then I do owe an apology for not catching up on my reading. And I am most sincere; I do not wish to offend unjustly...

    I will say however, that all of you rebels seem to have some real problems going on. And I am not talking about the Master either. It seems to me that you all were broken long before He got to you.


  11. Iscariot- Wow, you're an annoying lil' spitfuck, aren't ya'? You remind me of those five year olds running around and thinking they know everything and then throwing a hissy fit when they get proved wrong, hehe. Nonetheless, you're amusing.
    And as for the people being broken thing- of course people are broken. It's a world of sin, you shouldn't be expecting sunshine and peace and love. Being twisted and mangled is just another part of being human, I guess.
    Oh yeah, and before I forget, you wanna piece of me? Get in line, I have a fanbase kiddo, hehe.

    Ava- Well, while I am glad to see that you're accepting of me...and I don't want you to leave cause' you're more or less my best friend at this point Ava, but be careful. I know that when you came back from being with Redlight...there was a big part of me that wanted to kill ya'. Wanted to kill Reach cause' I know he served that bastard. Hell, I wanna kill my daughter sometimes to. Doesn't seem wrong, seems logical.

    Hyde- Who's Arkady? Am I supposed to know? And thanks for the warning/threat, makes me feel loved, y'know?

    Cynthia- Trust me sweetheart, if I go down I'm taking you with me.

  12. Come now Tony, I make no claims to knowing everything and I apologized for making a statement without full knowledge of the situation.

    Humans are broken, I am not. The Master has made me whole, as he could have done you, if you had allowed.


  13. Trust me, kid, that thing doesn't make you whole. That thing changes you and twists you around as much as it wants for it's own amusement and then sets you loose to see what you do. I allowed it to do that to me for six years. And then...hell, I don't even remember how I first got taken let alone got free. But I do know I'm better like this.

    It changed my head around. Now I'm messed up in the mind and I can't understand things I should. It's fuckin' torture, not a present.