Damn

Thought I couldn't cry anymore.

This Caretaker guy that Cathy keeps talking about seems like just another average tool in the shed. I don't know how we haven't caught him yet but I know if he decides to keep the creepy scrapbooking up we'll find him and kick his ass. Maybe he'll even tell us where Cathy is so we can finally get her away from that thing.

I've been keeping Cynthia from getting on the blog. There's no need for her to get involved in a shit storm again seeing as it almost broke her last time. I think that therapist that she sees actually helps though. She's calmer than she's been in weeks. Maybe that psychotherapy mumbo-jumbo isn't such bullshit after all. Simon says that she just needed someone to unload on, even if it's not the full truth. Says I'm not the best option for that and I guess he's right. Who wants to talk to their sociopathic father who looks like a pirate? Not many kids, I think.

Speaking of Simon he's been getting more uneasy. I think the pictures got to him more than us cause' we're used to crazy things like that. He's always triple checking the locks and making sure the alarm is on. Not that I'm complaining since some security is better than none, I just think in the long run a few dinky bolts aren't gonna hold what's really after us away.

As for me I've been spending my days by myself mostly. Valentine's Day came and went and, fuck, I don't remember much of it since I got drunk pretty bad. Simon says he kept Cynthia away from me so at least he's not totally useless. I'm not paranoid but I'm not carefree. I'm somewhere in between where I've become so jaded with all this supernatural bullshit that I'm not really surprised by anything anymore. I don't think it's a good thing for me to not care as much, but it comes with the time spent having to deal with all of this.

How are all you kiddies doing? Keepin' your asses outta trouble?

I was having a nice breakfast since Simon apparently knows how to cook when I see Cathy's latest post. Now Simon's computer is covered in water because I choked and spit it out when I read. That's my baby? Shit I don't even remember what happened during those two months so how does she know for sure?!

I mean how long has she had the thing?!

How the fuck am I supposed to handle this when I don't even know where she is and whether or not she's crazy and out for my blood? Goddammit things keep getting more and more complicated...

Fucking hell

Things are getting RETARDEDLY CHAOTIC again. Just when I thought they were gonna calm down and maybe we'd live a little normally...

Cathy is pregnant and I don't even fucking know who did it.

Ava is back.

Goddamn Robert is back too.

And Cynthia...well, today at school she saw our old pal hanging outside her classroom window and watching her. She got fucking spooked so bad she had to ask the teacher if she could leave early. Apparently she was more scared of it hurting that Leah kid then caring about herself, heh. She's got some balls, that's for sure.

With everything happening around the same time I can only assume that shit is about to get pretty messed up pretty fast. I warned Simon and Cynthia to keep their heads low and try not to update her blog as much or at all. We don't need to draw the attention of the stupid minions. Last thing we need is some idiot psycho charging into the house with a cleaver screaming that it wants us dead or back or something. I'll be updating this stupid thing though seeing as there's not really a choice at this point with my wife not only missing but with child and a familiar face popping back up.

I dunno, guess it's time to get ready to fight again.

....Keep your asses outta trouble.

You know, it's the funniest fucking thing when your daughter who isn't really your daughter has more balls to try and do something than you. And her pet copper decides to take her side of the argument one night so you have to drag the stupid shit outta the room by his ear and argue with him like you're a married couple.

Hell, maybe this is why those moms around the neighborhood have been giving us odd looks, hehe.

But whatever, that's beside the point. The point is that I still can't fucking remember what happened during that time Cathy and I were missing. I have no idea why she's a minion for it now. I don't know how we got out of the goddamn forest. And I sure as hell don't know why I was lying in a warehouse with it suddenly looming in the corner acting like it was gonna kill me this time for sure.

Fuck I don't even know how the hell I got away. It could have killed me and I'm not stupid enough to think it was my own amazing agility that got me away. It fucking let me go like it's been letting me go for eleven years. Eleven. Goddamn. Years.

So what, I'm just some fucking hilarious toy that just never stops being fun to mess with? I guess that's it cause' there's no other way to explain how I survived this thing haunting me during my teenage years and then stalking me and using me during my thirties. I mean, fuck, I turn forty this week. I haven't even thought about my birthday for years and out of the blue Cynthia mentions that Simon's is in December and I remember that my birthday is November 5th. I didn't have time to think about birthdays when I was on the run. Honestly I fucking thought every year would be the year that my "luck" finally ran out and I'd kick the bucket.

Now look at me: one of the oldest goddamn runners that I know, alone and miserable, living with some traffic-cop-fbi-wannabe and my unrelated daughter who doesn't even seem to really like me at all, and wondering when that thing will just come and put me out of my misery.

I've been through hell and fuck sometimes I wish it would end. I'm old. Got gray hairs coming in fast and joints creaking. I have too many scars- thanks to that Elijah fucker and other minions like him- to let me walk through town without people looking at me suspiciously. I lost a fucking eye and got some nice marks all over my face that make me look like I'm sneering all the time. I've broken so many bones that one of my hands is twisted in some crippled position. On bad days I can only limp around cause my right leg fucking kills me. Back pains, bone pain, fucking my whole body hurts pain.

I guess this is just a game to that thing. See how long Tony can withstand this torture, how long his body can take the hurt. I can't keep going like this. One day I'm not gonna be strong enough to survive the next minion attack or I'll just fucking let that thing rip me to shreds.

It'd be so fuckin' easy, y'know? But then I got my little daughter-who-looks-like-a-son telling me she's gonna play hero and run off to find her mommy and she's fucking eleven years old and I just have to keep going. I gotta find a way to make sure she's safe from everything that could hurt her before I call it quits. Goddamn I just wanna delete this stupid blog. Everything got worse cause' I made it. If I just hadn't stolen that one teenagers itouch-pod-thing then maybe all of this wouldn't happen. Or maybe Cathy and Cynthia would be dead- I don't even fucking know anymore.

Time has gotten real jumbled for me. My memories are fading or mixing cause' of all the mind fucking I've experienced over the last...entirety of my life. Sometimes I wake up thinking it's a different year, that I'm somewhere else and I gotta kill someone. I mean hell, I'm even forgetting basic functions sometimes. There's only so much a mind can be messed with before it breaks too. The other day I forgot how to work the toaster. Laugh it up because yeah, it's a goddamn toaster. But for the life of me my brain stopped working and I just stood there holding a piece of bread in one hand and staring in frustration at the stupid thing cause' my body wouldn't move and my mind wouldn't work it out and tell it how to move. Simon did it for me.

I'm falling apart. I don't have much time left. I need to find out how to get Cynthia safe soon cause' I don't know how much more I can take. Shit, it sounds depressing and yeah I just ranted to some idiot kids on the fucking internet but I don't even care at this point. I just wanna make everything better for my daughter. That's all I want.

So

How the fuck have you kiddies been?

My entire body has been in pain for the last...I dunno, week or two that I can remember. I have no idea what happened after the stand off in the field, I just know I woke up in some warehouse somewhere. I had no idea where the fuck I was and Cathy was laying next to me unconscious.

The problem is...Cathy wasn't herself. When she woke up she was acting strange and I got pretty paranoid pretty fast. You can't trust her cause', well, it showed up and she went with it willingly. Started smiling and laughing like it was the best thing in the world. I got the hell out of there before it turned its attention towards me, tried to drag Cathy along with me but she socked me in the face with the one arm she has left. Yeah, her other arm is definitely cut off at the elbow but it looks like it was burnt to prevent it from bleeding out. Not sure who did that, but it looked almost like, well, these really long fingers like it had grabbed her.

Anyway she has a mean right hook and started shouting at me. She didn't make any sense and it was coming closer. I...had to leave her. As soon as I figured out where the hell I was- fucking California of all places- I had to hitch hike my way across the country with basically no money and all my shit missing except for the clothes on me.

Eventually I got to Georgia. Just hoofed it once I was close enough and of course it started fucking raining while I was walking for hours. Got some strange looks in the process, but I like to think it's cause' of my amazingly good looks. I honestly just wandered around until I remembered where Simon's house was.

Hehe, tell you what though, the look on his face when he opened the door to me standing drenched in the rain looking like shit, hungry, smelly and pissed, was priceless. I think he about peed himself which would have been perfect. But before he could really say anything Cynthia came out of fucking no where and kicked me in the shin. Yeah, nice daughter. Started yelling at me and saying that she wasn't gonna go back and shit like that. I guess she thought I had been taken by it and was a minion again. I mean, jeez, gimme a little bit of credit, I survived over ten years and got away from that thing before, I'm stronger than I look.

Anyway, when she came close I just pulled her into a hug. I mean, shit, she's my daughter, related or not. I was supposed to give her the ideal life- y'know, take her wherever she wants, talk to any potential boyfriends and scare them off, and tuck her in at night. But I couldn't and she suffered because of me. I know she did. The second it clicked in her head that I wasn't trying to hurt her she started crying and snotting all over the place. Hugged me back and said a bunch of stuff that got muffled by my jacket.

But I got the gist of it. I missed her too and I was glad that she was alright too.

She got me inside and Simon still looked like he wanted to shoot me or report me or something- which I don't blame him for, I'd be pretty fucking suspicious too- but Cynthia, heh, started ordering him around like he was the child and she was the adult. Got me a shower, some clean clothes and food before the two of them started drowning me in all their questions. Where had I been? What happened? How did I survive? Where was Cathy?

...I had to break that to her. It hurt her, I can tell. Hurt me too. She's thinking this is all her fault when it's really not. Fuck, I dunno, I tried making her feel better but I'm no mommy and I haven't actually taken care of kids before. Even Simon seems to be better at this than me, which makes sense cause' he's a little bitch, but still...it's my kid, y'know? We're gonna try figuring out how to get Cathy back but hell, Cathy and I couldn't even do it before when Cynthia got taken...it's hard to get your hopes up after so long of them being shot down.

Fuck anyway, I've been resting up. Apparently wherever I was this past...almost two months I didn't exactly eat or sleep well and took a beating. I got new bruises and scars and some nice burns to add to my collection of fucked up body parts. I bet I look like Prince fucking Charming, hehe.

What the hell has happened while I've been gone?

Y'know I don't fucking care if I'm her blood-related father or not, that girl is my kid and I'm not gonna stop trying to get her back. This past week I acted like a little bitch and moped around feeling bad for myself which is really odd for me. Today I finally snapped out of it to realize that I wasn't the only one feeling bad. Cynthia is still under the psychos supervision and it, Cathy has been sinking into depression badly and doesn't even really talk anymore, and I even saw Simon a few times when I was walking around town and he looked like a mess, like he hadn't slept in days.

Fuck it all, if everyone else can't do shit then I will. I'll get Cynthia back and solve this whole goddamn situation and maybe if I'm lucky I'll get to kill that little shit Redlight too.

This blog used to be for myself only. Funny how that changes. It was just gonna record when I lost time or when I was going into a dangerous situation that I might not come out of. Then everything went to hell, didn't it? Met a bunch of people I said I would never befriend and somehow I fucking did. Got a large group of strangers to care about me even though I told them I was a torturer who loved his job for years. Ironically then got tortured by crazy ex-boyfriends. Found my wife and somehow resolved things with her. Went against the law and fucking won.

The only thing I haven't done is get my daughter back. Yeah, she's my fucking daughter, not Elijah's or anyone else. My kid. And so I'm gonna get her back. Fuck the impossible odds cause if I go out, I'm going out laughing and cussing up a storm at it while punching Redlight in the face.

Yeah, that sounds about right, hehe.